Perils of multi-tenant housing: the awkward hours

The thump of the Sunday Times

at your door.

Just when you thought it safe

to venture out for the wedding 

of the week, somebody shows up

to borrow the book review. And

what is this world coming to?

As if that weren't enough, he wonders if he mightn't borrow your shaver, resonating through the wall.

And, oh yes, by the way, just in case you aren't at the moment using your father's Mark Cross chinning gloves ..

or thought you might be able to take in a quiet swim, without drawing the entire human race into a traffic jam at this ostensibly private gym ..

but please don't even ask why he doesn't seem to have any hot water, not that you've been showering at unusual length ..

and don't say we didn't warn against a breakfast on the balcony, that's the slightest bit aromatic ..

so it would be only too gruesome, under the circumstances, to coun-tenance resort to the elevators.