Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Pss-sst! Mitt, darling, we saw your movie

I don't know what the government's coming to! Instead of protecting businessmen, it's poking its nose into business. Why, they're talking now about having bank examiners .. as if we didn't know how to run our own banks. I actually had a letter, from some popinjay official, saying they were going to inspect my books! I have a program, gentlemen, that should be blazoned on every newspaper in the country.

America for Americans! Don't let the government meddle with business! Reduce taxes! Our national debt is shocking .. What the country needs is a businessman for President!

Hélas, mesdames et messieurs, they repaired the telegraph wires, and word got through. Our hero Gatewood was apprehended when the stage reached Lordsburg. We agree with Vito Corleone: how a man makes his living, is no concern of ours; and Mitt has made a lovely living for himself by feasting on others', lending that helping hand to the ration-al allocation of capital we admired as Gatewood stuffed his customers' whole lives into his valise. 

No; what galls is that he cut the telegraph wire. A hero cannot be ashamed. We want our Mitt to run, with-out covering his tracks with doilies and maids in the media. We want, we need the whole exegesis of jackal economics to resound in full throated bellowings of its voracious rage to claw, to gnaw, to drool and not to drain the cistern for our sake, of its gorgeous scavenging ache. On our stage to Lordsburg, we had a gambler, a whore, a whiskey drummer, a sawbones and a very pregnant powermommy. Gatewood would have fit in, but he cut the telegraph wire. We need a passenger who can stand who he is.

John Ford, director
Dudley Nichols, screenplay
Ernest Haycox, book
Walter Wanger Productions, 1939©


  1. but can you imagine the White House filled with all that Romney testosterone? His boys would certainly cause a scene in DC.

  2. I'd be worried about distracting the ghost of James Buchanan. You put forth a very fine argument for not domiciling them there.

  3. au contraire, all the more reason.